Why is it that…

Why is it that:

  • Whenever you bad mouth someone, they are usually standing behind you?
  • Whenever you need your keys, they are always in the opposite pocket to your free hand?
  • Whenever you are carrying a heavy object, your nose gets itchy?
  • Whenever you are in a public restroom, there is never enough toilet tissue?
  • Whenever you are in the shower the phone always rings?
  • Whenever you sit down to eat, a damn telemarketer always calls?
  • Whenever you forget to bring along poop bags when you walk your dog, he always does his business on the lawn of the neighbor who is standing outside?
  • Whenever you seal an envelope, you realize that you forgot to put in the most important document?
  • Whenever you have to sneeze, you never have a Kleenex?
  • Whenever you take the day off sick, your boss is always in the store you are shopping in?
  • Whenever you have a report due on a deadline, your brain goes into sleep mode?

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